← Touch

Cheek kissing between men in the Arab world

Two men kiss cheeks: fraternal affinity/close friendship.

Category : TouchSubcategory : salutations-tactilesConfidence level : 3/5 (documented hypothesis)Identifier : e0164

Meaning

Target direction : A demonstration of deep male friendship and fraternal respect.

Interpreted meaning : Westerners confuse it with a supposed homosexual relationship.

Geography of misunderstanding

1. The gesture and its meaning

In the Arab world, two men greet each other with two cheek kisses, sometimes followed by a brief handshake or arm contact. The gesture means deep friendship, brotherly trust, mutual respect with no romantic connotation. Common between close friends, allied political figures, extended family. Age irrelevant. Number of kisses varies: 2 in Saudi Arabia and UAE, 3 in Lebanon. Cheek contact with unrelated women = strict taboo.

2. Geography of misunderstanding

Maximum confusion arises when Westerners observe two Arab men kissing cheeks and assume a homosexual orientation. The dynamic is structurally asymmetric: the Arab operates from a clear cultural framework (platonic brotherhood); the Westerner involuntarily projects their own gender codes. Symptoms: prolonged confused gaze, subsequent comments, relational distancing. Aggravating contexts: formal business meetings at a first encounter.

3. Historical genesis

The Arab male cheek kiss is a pre-Islamic Bedouin cultural practice (Arabian Peninsula) — and not an established Islamic Sunnah. Primary Islamic sources do not trace the cheek kiss in the Prophetic tradition (IslamQA 2015: the Prophetic Sunnah establishes musafaha and muanaqah, not the cheek kiss). Quran 24:30-31 concerns visual modesty (gadd al-basar) and has no connection to this gesture. Pre-Islamic Bedouin fraternity consolidated physical contact between men as an alliance marker. 18th-19th century colonial European diplomats described cheek kissing as a strange masculine affection — a homophobic projection.

4. Contemporary variants

Country variation: Lebanon 3 kisses (left-right-left), Saudi Arabia/UAE/Jordan 2 kisses. Class/milieu variation: urbanised young people in Cairo or Beirut sometimes adopt the Western handshake-only norm. In diaspora contexts (Europe, North America), Arab-origin men individually negotiate between both codes. Cheek kissing between men in Arab media and public political events remains common and unstygmatised in Gulf and Levant countries.

5. Practical recommendations

Observe before acting: if two Arab men approach with open arms, anticipate cheek kisses without sexual projection. Accept the gesture naturally. Western men: overcome cultural discomfort — the gesture is fraternal-friendly. Never ask questions about supposed sexual orientation. Western women: never initiate cheek kisses with non-family Arab men. Respectful alternatives: firm handshake, benevolent eye contact, verbal greeting As-salamu alaykum.

Historical origins

Arab male cheek-kiss is a pre-Islamic Bedouin fraternal practice (Arabian Peninsula, ethnographic attestation). It is a cultural Arab practice — not an established Islamic Sunnah: IslamQA (2015) notes that primary Islamic sources do not trace cheek kissing in the Prophetic tradition. Strict heterosexual taboo: cheek kissing between unrelated men and women = inappropriate (Wikipedia EN, Cultural Atlas SBS). Country variation: Lebanon 3 kisses; Saudi Arabia/UAE 2 kisses; varies by familiarity.

Practical recommendations

Neutral alternatives

• Solid, formal handshake (respectable universal)
• Warm eye contact with benevolent smile
• As-salamu alaykum" verbal greeting alone
• Light shoulder pressure if cheek contact impossible

Sources